Nebraska football is the guy who 30 years ago was the vice president of the local bank, with a wife, a house and a nice car. Then alcohol got the best of him, and now he pushes a shopping cart collecting pop bottles for smokes and sleeps in a cardboard box. He points across the street and tells people at the bus stop, “I used to run that bank!” (shakes his fist) He shuffles off with his head down, muttering about aliens, “grays” and the Federal Reserve.

[9/11/22 update: Nebraska fires Scott Frost after stunning loss to Georgia Southern]