Author Archives: Iowa Life

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About Iowa Life

Experiencing life in Iowa.

Dogs and cats, monkeys and bats

Some of my best friends are cats. I feel I owe it to them to attempt this exercise in futility and try and educate ignorant Americans about what goes on in China. Assuming this picture is a few years old, these cats pictured will have long ago been eaten by “humans”. Aside from the evil nature of it, you can ask a biologist sometime why its not in the interest of humans to eat carnivores. That list of animals in the title of this post? That’s just a sampling of what those nutcases in China eat. You’re not supposed to eat predators. The rest of the world pays a price because the Chinese are evil retards. Environmentally, ecologically, medically. Harsh words? You bet.

Incredible


“There was a time I could have been mistaken for Burt Reynolds. I had a mustache and so did he. But he was the number one star in the world, so there wasn’t really much confusion.” – Tom Selleck

Charge (17-3 in central Iowa) has started carrying reruns of Magnum, P.I.. What’s incredible is they’ve replaced the intro and theme music. It completely ruins the ‘bling’ aspect of the show. Stations do that because they don’t want to pay residuals to the musicians. I’ve seen it before with Bonanza and Walker Texas Ranger. I don’t know what it is with Hollywood contracts but for some reason musicians seem to have better contracts than the actors. That would be fun to know the answer to. The original series really benefitted from the music. Its just staggering the lengths Hollywood Jews will go to to avoid paying someone their rightful earnings. Your mind is subconsciously expecting to hear a certain music, then it doesn’t. Its unsettling.

The other thing it reminded me of was the complete lack of class/imagination by the Columbia Broadcasting System (CBS). They now have in the year 2020 a good part of their 80s lineup on in remakes of Magnum, P.I., MacGyver and Hawaii 5-0 (I just learned the other day that CBS is now also remaking Walker Texas Ranger). Is that incredible or what? Classic series that they couldn’t possibly hope to hold a candle to. And they didn’t. The twits of today don’t stand a chance of comparing well to Hollywood legends. Another tidbit is that on IMDB Magnum is listed as a 48 minute show. Today’s “1 hour” shows are invariably 41 or 42 minute shows, with 1 actually being 43 minutes. They talk about “creative” editing in the original run to add some commercial time.

Tom Selleck is an interesting guy. They wanted him for the Indiana Jones role, and he knew it was a good one, but he felt his obligation to the newly signed Magnum role was just too great not to uphold. It turns out there was a 6 month delay in the startup of Magnum shooting, so he could have done Indiana Jones as well! Such is life. He had another great quote (as goes with being one of Hollywood’s few ‘conservatives’). “I don’t know if my political opinions ever lost me work, but I know for sure they never got me any.” Oh, and to show the pure genius of Hollywood producers, the Magnum role was first offered to Kojak’s Kevin Dobson.

Frances Ethel Gumm

Judy (2019) starring Renée Zellweger was a disturbing little movie. Hollywood consuming another dear soul. Asking the question, “What could have been?” What if someone had been in Judy’s corner? We will never know. So many people share in the blame. Her mother. Her father. Herself. Ethel and Francis Gumm. Vaudevillians who knew they had something with Judy. One of the funniest stories is when they put 2 year old Judy into their Christmas act singing Jingle Bells and the tyke had to be drug kicking and screaming offstage! A similar addiction to the limelight was portrayed in a scene with Mickey Rooney. They had just finished a stage appearance and Mickey wanted to go get something to eat. Judy begged off to return for an encore. She couldn’t let go the light.

How much of her dysfunction did Hollywood cause? And how much had she brought with her? The dysfunction in her family had started before she was born. A homosexual father who had no business being in the marriage. A mother who saw a meal ticket. A sketchy upbringing in which her family was often homeless. How much this story is different from others during the Great Depression is beyond me. Its easy to blame her misfortunes on the ‘delicate little woman‘ syndrome, only Hollywood chewed up and spit out a ton of big strong men too (John Wayne, Elvis, Tab Hunter, Robert Mitchum, Marlon Brando).

There is something that causes performers to be addicts and addicts to be performers. Chicken and the egg. In Judy’s case the same man that made her also destroyed her. Louis Burt Mayer (Lazar Meir; July 12, 1884 – October 29, 1957). A Russian Jew of course and a sadistic son of a bitch. Giving uppers and downers to a 15 year old? Denying her food? Denying her childhood? He got his 20 years out of her he wanted. The fact he left a broken shell didn’t bother him. Permanently scarred from the abortion she got at his urging. Between that and the drugs she was doomed. And for what? Mayer was dead by ’57. Wikipedia is sure in love with the man.

The business manager who stole from her (celebrities and sports figures would be much better off just sticking their money in the bank and not trying to be fancy). The husbands, friends and family that enabled the addict. Addicts don’t exist without enablers. The weakness she inherited from her father. Its just criminal a woman who could give such joy to a nation should end up beat, broke and busted the final 10 years of her life. Wizard of Oz, Meet Me In St. Louis, Harvey Girls, Easter Parade, Ziegfield Girl, A Star Is Born and on and on. Hollywood has a monopoly and abuses it. How many lives were cut short? Or ruined? By the bright lights and greed.

An interesting thought that occurred to me was the different outcome of another child star, Shirley Temple. Not being an expert on either one, it would seem from the casual observation that Shirley went on to have a somewhat normal and productive life. Her father squandered her money so that at age 21 she received only a pittance instead of the fortune she had earned. A most interesting case study, the difference between the two.

“Come down off the ledge!”

Pandemics, if you’ve seen one you’ve seen them all. Okay not really. I’ve been on the fringe of prepper circles for decades. Cans of food, can opener, gold, silver, guns, cartridges, water, gasoline, knives, hatchets, rope… but toilet paper? Never saw that one coming, or going rather. We’d planned for the grid to go down, or mass riots where we needed 13 different firearms, but we NEVER thought of something as unsexy as toilet paper. I admit its unsettling to check store after store and see bare shelves where the toilet paper should be. The shit hits the fan and we’re left holding nothing! It doesn’t matter you have a storage unit full of it, dammit, you want more! This is America, we crap in style, we crap till you can’t crap no more!

Its not just about that, its the overall nature of the thing. In the past there hasn’t been too many things we couldn’t throw money at and solve. Not this one. Looking in the rearview mirror at it unfolding you cringe at the incompetent “leadership” of our country. This thing kicks off in China around 12/1 of last year. Our idiot government is trying to impeach a guy who did nothing wrong except beat Hillary. They don’t take the final vote on that until February 5, 2020, two months after it started. You can’t help but think their minds were elsewhere. Thank God the President stopped travel from China when he did, January 21 I believe. Amazon seems to be getting up to speed with masks now, but their shipping is a month out.

Store shelves remain bare of the most basic items, rubbing alcohol, alcohol wipes (eggs were even in short supply for a bit). There was a period 2 weeks ago nearly all the stores were bare except candy and broccoli. For an older American who’s never seen shortages it rattles your brain. When you stop and think about all the people out of work because the malls are closed, the restaurants are closed, how the heck are they making it?? They have the big box stores and the grocery stores stay open, but were they providing masks to the workers? Oh heck no. Finally they start emphasizing to people, when you come home throw your clothes into the laundry and take a shower.

I saw a meme that said, “When I think back to all the stupid things I’ve done, if I die now because I touched my face I’m going to be pissed!” Government taking too many liberties with your liberty. Telling you you can’t leave your house. Governor’s telling you you can’t take a life saving drug. They say depression, disorientation, are impacting people. The lack of meetings for 12-step groups, relapses. I was going by the closed high school and it occurred to me, what about the 12th graders who are in essence missing their final semester? Its a strange world. People who work at Walmart and the grocery stores being the heroes on the frontline of death without gear, and our lazy ass city and state workers inventing reasons they can’t do their job! 

What’s COVID-19 got to do with not picking up the leaf bags or the outsize garbage items? Do your damn job, you’re getting paid. A lot of people aren’t. CDC who for a month told us, “You don’t need  mask, cough into your elbow!” Brilliant. Government officials who wouldn’t know what “fast-track” meant if you hit ’em over the head with a ventilator. Paper pushers, you gotta light dynamite under their butt to get them moving. A country on the edge (ledge) and all the Democrats are planning their next impeachment.

3 of the logistical failures I find most interesting are rubbing alcohol, face masks and of course toilet paper. In neither case are these high tech items made from scarce, exotic materials. They are about as basic as it gets. Amazon seems to be getting up to speed with face masks, although their shipping times are abysmal. eBay might have better times, though at a higher cost. Rubbing alcohol is just non-existant. Stores seem completely unconcerned about supplying customer needs. Toilet paper is just nowhere to be found. But what I find most interesting about this is that generally in a free market, you might not like the price, but you can find the commodity.

In this case market principals have fallen apart, normal rules do not apply. Listening to Coast to Coast AM this morning two other principals were reinforced. “Western medicine” is about selling drugs (depending on the year pharmaceutical are the #1 lobbying interest in DC). There are new treatments that disable the virus, as in one case it disables the “burrowing” spike that allows it to get into cells. Another that was suggested was “blinding” it by the use of vitamin C. Something about the ions flooding the blood keeping the virus from taking hold by there being no room for their ions.

Lastly is something I’d first heard about was from a survivor of the 1918 Spanish Flu pandemic on YouTube. Baking soda. Each morning the mother of this family in rural Alabama would stir a half teaspoon of sodium bicarbonate into a few ounces of water. Every morning. Their family survived. In fact they were the go to family as far as getting groceries delivered and doing things for the other families. You couple that with statements from today about the importance of blood PH and it makes you wonder. Another interesting home remedy was a salt water gargle. A half teaspoon of salt in 4 ounces of warm water.

[An interesting tidbit just coming out about masks was that in late January the CCP had its overseas operations begin procuring and returning masks back to China. Their intention was to corner the market by controlling production and quantity on hand. And they did.]

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Cool seventies photos

Fiddling around with my blog formats, I seem to have found my favorite layout. It allows pictures to go nearly from “edge to edge”. Being a photo guy, I like that. And being a boomer, the seventies are “my decade” in a way. There are strong ties to the sixties and eighties, but the seventies are kind a ‘it’. The cars, women and fashion were…. timeless? Unforgettable? Stunning? Breathtaking? Whatever adjective you use, I think you’d have to agree the decade was visually appealing.


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Street Life of Americans in The 1970s (10)

1970s fashion (32)

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“Ah, ah, ah, ah, Stayin’ Alive!”

I chose to lead off with this photo on purpose. Finola is talking to a woman in the foreground who also has a lot of hair. I thought it captured the 80s so well. Lots and lots of hair. Hair as far as the eye can see.

Cruising YouTube the other day brought on the disco revival! Say amen! It started with KC and the Sunshine Band. Which was a gateway group to Gloria Gaynor, Three Degrees and others. Being musically ignorant I tried to get some information on ‘the disco beat’. There’s some at Wikipedia, but to a large degree, simple info is tough to find. It seems 4/4 time was the beat used. I think it comes out to 120 beats per minute (then I start to get the indication ‘time’ is not necessarily ‘beats per minute’). A lot of exercise videos like to use 130 bpm. Either way, I loved it! For those not familiar with disco the Saturday Night Fever soundtrack will get you started. One of my favorite tracks from that movie was David Shire’s Manhattan Skyline. Musical heaven to me. Harry Wayne Casey’s I’m Your Boogie Man (although its never really made clear what being our ‘Boogie Man’ consists of) was another classic.

Yvonne Elliman (Jesus Christ Superstar) singing If I Can’t Have You. Disco consisted of a lot of bass, horns, sometimes organ, tambourine, piano, violin, stuff I love. While I liked a lot of the rock classics (Smoke On the Water, Slow Ride, Long Cool Woman), disco consisted of more than 3 guitars and a set of drums. Disco is the one that get’s your foot tapping. It also had a lot of orchestration. Beautiful. John Travolta had a huge hand in it with Saturday Night Fever and Stayin’ Alive. SNF being the bigger of the 2 what with the mind blowing success of the soundtrack, largely the Bee Gees. I think the beauty of the music bolstered the beauty of the 2 lead females, Karen Lynn Gorney and  Finola Hughes (where the heck does the name ‘Finola’ come from?).

But anyway, that is who the pictures are of. 2 very pretty women. The edge for me is Finola, she’s got that Rachel Ward vibe that sends a guy over the edge. Karen seems more the hardboiled scrapper.

What was interesting was the timing of the 2 movies. SNF was 1977 at the height of the disco craze. SA was 1983, post mortem. There was a bizarre event at Comiskey Park on July 12, 1979 where they blew up a crate of disco records between games at an event called Disco Demolition Night. It was all part of this drive to make disco seem uncool. I don’t get it. I missed out on a lot of good music back then by the determiners of cool making some really bad calls. But as far as the movies go its illustrative to look at budget versus US gross on the 2. Stayin’ Alive budget $22 million vs $64 million gross. Good. Saturday Night Fever: budget $3 million, gross $94 million, phenomenal. 3x vs 30x.

In the intervening 6 years between movies someone was able to stick a knife in disco. Not sure who it was. Were the “wrong” record companies making the big bucks? Was it the “wrong” artists getting all the attention? In a situation like this all you have to do is follow the money. I guarantee you an industry insider could tell you what happened. Artistically there was nothing wrong with disco. But somebody really wanted to label it “uncool” for the masses. I’d love to know what the story was. Disco didn’t die, it was murdered! I have to figure the “wrong” label had the disco artists. Somebody’s ox was getting gored.

(I could watch reruns of ‘CHiPs’ if it wasn’t for their incredibly bad representation of disco music they use in interludes and chase scenes.)

Nobody ever told them?

It came out recently that former presidential candidate Michael Bloomberg spent real close to a billion dollars on his Quixotic quest. Yeah I said $1,000,000,000. That’s a lot of moolah to spend for self-gratification. When he started I wondered, “He does know he’s the most boring individual on earth, right?” Evidently he didn’t know that, and Tom Steyer of course had to prove me wrong. Tom said, “Hold my beer”, and immediately setout to prove himself the most boring individual on the planet. Alright Tom, you win. But Mike’s a close second. The point is that in their entire circle of personal and business contacts, no one had the heart to tell them the truth? 

That’s incredible! Between the 2 of them the figure is way over a billion dollars. For what? To feed their ego? That’s some expensive chow. Hell, I would have told them for free. So I’m doing the shower/shave thing this morning and I flip the radio on to KPSZ Praise 940 for a little sermon in the shower. I’m listening to this halting, droning, monotone supposedly preaching God’s word and I’m thinking, “This is the worst preacher I’ve ever heard!” Not second, not third, the worst! Who does he think he’s going to reach with the worst presentation I’ve heard in 50 years of listening to radio preachers?? Nobody is going to listen to that. He or his congregation is wasting their money. Money that could go to a useful purpose.

From looking at 940’s schedule online it looks like it is Pastor Tom Carlson with the show Plainly the Truth. You think you’ve been ‘called’ with that delivery? Really? He’s either a stroke victim or the single worst public speaker I’ve ever heard in my life. I’m supposed to believe you’re on fire for God? On fire for Jesus? On fire for the Holy Spirit? I’m sorry, I don’t believe you. You’re not folksy, you’re not cute, you’re not whatever. No one has ever told you this? You might be good in an instruction setting, or developing an online interactive bible study. From the sound of your voice you’re an older man who has been into it 40 years. Did you always sound like this? Train somebody new, you’re wasting money. Money that could have gone to buying bibles, or Habitat for Humanity, or food for the poor, or something useful! 

[Self delusion! That’s the phrase I was looking for.]

 

 

Cutting through the crap

I’ve been a radio listener since the 60’s, I know a little bit about it. I know most people aren’t ‘crap cutters’, they’re bull-shitters (spellcheck liked that better with a hyphen). They have diarrhea of the mouth. That’s probably enough bowl movement metaphors. But anyway, I just heard another fantastic segment of the early morning show Coast to Coast.  A wonderful, wonderful radio show. Most people will never hear it. Most people aren’t insomniac radio geeks. I grew up watching Leonard Nimoy narrate episodes of In Search Of. Coast and Search are very similar shows. Bigfoot, Loch Ness, UFOs, shadow people, ghosts, demons, the Bermuda Triangle, ‘Greys’, cloud seeding, Knights Templar, I’m talking seriously neat stuff.

But you have to get to it! Commercial broadcasting whether it be radio or television has one annoying requirement: they have to make money. Newsflash eh? A radio “hour” is about 33 minutes long depending on the show (I timed it). At the top of the hour you have at most 1 minute of news. Then about 6 minutes of commercials, weather forecast, traffic report, station promos and maybe a public service announcement. A show like Coast to Coast will then have another 3 1/2 minutes of commercial to replace the 20 minutes after break, so they can have one uninterrupted segament about 16 and 1/2 minutes long to the bottom of the hour. They will then repeat the process for the second half hour. That my friends is 1 radio hour, 33 minutes.

Ya get what ya pay for. On Coast to Coast the host has 2 formats: guest or ‘open line’ time. Both generally involve callers. Callers can be the best of times and the worst of times. This next paragraph is one I put on the Coast to Coast Facebook page. Not that it matters, but it gets something off my chest.

“Great stuff, can’t believe I missed it. As I get more TOP (time on planet) I really came to appreciate Coast. Never though (at least in this lifetime) will I understand callers who can’t get to the POINT. Do callers really think they have 40 minutes for the windup? No, you don’t, make the damn pitch. A radio “half hour” has about 18 minutes in it, and despite what your parents told you, you are not the most important person on earth. A nation is listening, and we really don’t need to know in a story about you seeing a “dark figure cross the road in front of you at 2 am in July of 1978 in Fort Smith, Arkansas that scared the hell out of you”, that your momma Maybell who goes by ‘May’ cause her daddy liked springtime and wanted her to always remind him of spring, had fallen asleep in the passenger seat and didn’t see the creature because she was so tired from working 2 jobs after the plant closed down in Jonesboro and the job at the Quicky Mart didn’t pay enough, what with her having 7 kids…”

I have literally heard the host take a call at :25 minutes past the hour, giving the caller nearly 5 minutes to get to the point before the hard break at the bottom of the hour, and the caller could not/would not do it. They had a great story about a ghost, or Bigfoot, or an alien abduction or whatever! But we’ll never know because they could not be succinct. Just mind numbing.

[Just the picture used for this post has several aspects to it. Is it for a remote station downlink? Is it a dish “listening” for ET? Is it a military dish outside Area 51? Who knows? Art Bell started a radio show in 1978 called West Coast AM. In 1988 it became Coast to Coast. I just read Art died in 2018 of an accidental drug overdose at age 72. Sad and pointless. Currently the big dog is George Noory. There are also weekend and fill in hosts Ian this and Jimmy that and some woman host and who knows all. They generally all have incredible patience. Its like they know that aside from the entertainment value of the show, they are providing on-air group therapy for a lot of disturbed people out there.]

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“If I had the money I’d smoke 3, 4 of these a day”

1973! Charlton Heston in Soylent Green. I don’t know why I’d think of a movie about a bleak dystopian future right now, oh wait! The death and destruction being spread by China’s gift to the world, the Kung Flu. The year in the movie is 2022. Our government isn’t quite there, yet. They’re not actively scooping up people and dumping them in garbage trucks. Well, other than LA I mean. Cigarettes were really expensive in the movie, that’s why his detective character would kill for a wealthy homicide case. You got your pick of the booze, the cigarettes, the food in the fridge. Speaking of food, that was the point of the whole movie. They’d run out. So they began a rather drastic recycling program: people.

[Its the year 2048: “Hillary announces run for the White House. Star Wars fans excited about this weekend’s release of the latest Star Wars movie.”]

The Osmonds

“Who knew?” You go down through the comments section on YouTube and you read a lot of that. Just a month or 2 ago I did a similar post on Marie Osmond where I was metaphorically shaking my head. I lived through the 70s, swear to God we had no idea this was the pinnacle of musical expression. We had just assumed it would always be this way. Boy were we wrong. In this song Down by the Lazy River (written by Alan & Merrill Osmond), Merrill sings the lead. As he was The Osmond’s lead singer. Sometime later in the 80s maybe when they shifted to country, they became The Osmond Brothers.

But as I was saying the comments were just amazed with other ignorant people like me who had no idea the Osmond’s were such a high-energy, fun group! They think back to 10 – 15 years prior to this when they were doing the barbershop quartet thing on The Andy Williams Show in the early to mid 60s. This video is around 1972 or 1973 as Donny looks to be around 15 or 16. (Alan 1949, Wayne 1951, Jay 1955, Merrill 1953, Donny 1957, Marie 1959, Jimmy 1963) People were blown away by their musicality, vocals and dance ability. Clean-cut, well dressed, didn’t end up in jail, “nice boys”. This particular video is a little odd visually as its doing the ‘psychedelic 70s’ thing, but the audio is superb.